Apr 17

Saying Goodbye

How do you know it is time to let go and say goodbye to a relationship, a pet, a life? When death does not come when it should have come what do you do? I remember the conversation with my ex-husband in the car in the parking lot of the grocery store; Me “Do you want a divorce?” Him “I think so” Me “Ok, great “and that was that. A couple trips to the mediator and we were divorced after 20 years. It was time.
When the cat became sick I told the kids, say goodbye he might not come home from the vet, he is 18 you know. They said goodbye to their lifelong pet and off I went to the dreaded vet. She said well, we could treat the infection but the weight loss would require blood work and urinalysis and further testing. She looked at me and my 18 year old cat and she knew it was time to say goodbye.
When Mom passed away in the hospital Hospice unit the nurses told us it was time to say goodbye. They called one morning and said “Its time” and we all gathered with the deacon from the Episcopal Church who happened to be our Methodist Pastor’s sister. There we were and we said goodbye and she was gone and in the blink of an eye a life was over.
What happens when no one says goodbye for you? An uncle of mine is the bravest man I know. He has been very sick for many years and he has decided that it is time and he has decided to discontinue treatment. He knows very well that this will mean the final goodbye as does his wife. He is in good spirits and accepts my visits. We all know it is a matter of days or a week and the time with him is precious so we value it.
I guess the best part is that we have all been given an opportunity to say goodbye at all! So many others are not. So as I reflect on all of the goodbyes I have said lately I thank God that I was given the time and opportunity to say goodbye at all.
I think about the people who never got to say goodbye. A couple killed in a car accident last night no one was there to say goodbye to them, the victims of 9-11 only a few got to say goodbye via cell phone. I wonder if I will get to say goodbye someday. I think the important thing is to always tell your loved ones how you feel about them every day and then if goodbye never comes, you know they knew how you felt.
Goodbye(for today) to all of you and God Bless you !

twitterlinkedintwitterlinkedinby feather
Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailFacebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

Permanent link to this article: http://christinejbaxter.net/saying-goodbye/


    • sjchesney on June 21, 2012 at 10:42 pm
    • Reply

    My brother moved to California years ago, and even before that we didn’t see each other much…always loved each other unconditionally, but, you know, you get busy and it seems that there will always be time. When he was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer, I realized that we can never take “time” for granted. The one visit he was able to make to our home was awesome and the many visits we were able to make to CA were priceless. He lived for a long time with his condition and was very brave, and I thank God for the blessings of the times we had together to say hello and goodbye. Thank you for your very insightful blog, Christine.

    1. Thank you for sharing your goodbye with your brother, I am so glad you had the time to do so.

Leave a Reply